I have not been writing. I peek into a thing and get excited, then I stop and don't go back. I actually started a new thing a few days ago, got very excited, then I stopped altogether. I suppose I will write when I really want to and I don't feel the need to force myself. At least, not yet.
As many an English gentlemen has been known to say, I find myself at my leisure. This is unsettling because I think it may be forever. I think I have stopped working for a living. And I seem to be swimming and browsing and watching TV for a living. And cleaning a bit. And shopping too much. As always with all things, I am trying to strike a balance. If I am to be a homemaker, then I need to make this home. Really.
But it's hard. My fibro has flared and my guts are just in despair I am in despair. I found a new doctor and I love him. He listens. He understands. He talks with me. He told me to buy a Vitamix and it is winging its way here.
Dr. Samuels told me that I should be able to tolerate smoothies--real smoothies. With greens and veggies and fruits. I am afraid to try this and I will start out very slowly. But Crystal, the author of Living Well With Gastroparesis, also recommends a Vitamix and says that she makes smoothies with BERRIES and has no problem. BERRIES. BERRIES. I despair my current lack of BERRIES. My kingdom for some RASPBERRIES.
And about the water. Becky and I get into the water. A lot LOT. I'm getting in there four or five times a week. Maybe more. I can't keep track of it. But it's a lot. And it is a habit, a lovely, lovely habit. And when the nurse asks me, do you exercise I can say YES, a big, fat, YES thank you very much. So whatever else I do wasting time with the TV, with shopping, with whatever, I am on the move and I feel fantastic, even when I feel crappy.
And then there's the weight loss. I've lost a lot of weight, you know? And people make comments, all the time. Some are welcome--You look awesome!! Thank you. Others not so welcome--"How did you DO it?" "You Skinny Thing!" "You're melting away!" "You're going to blow away!" and the unthinkable--"How much have you lost?" Really. I'm tired of answering these questions. I feel like a deer in the headlights, mostly because I have lost the weight crazy fast and I do not really know if being sick has had anything to do with or maybe EVERYTHING to do with it. But I do know that the last time I dropped a LOT of weight, it was just like this--Boom! Hammer Down! And I was not sick. I simply ate less and MOVED a LOT.
Probably it's quite simple. When I calculate a big meal, the kind you have at a restaurant, or when you have friends over for a fancy dinner, when I eat a meal like that, when I used to eat a meal like that, I would easily eat 2500+ calories in one sitting. And I was mostly SITTING all the time. So I cut my calories. And I moved more. Eat less, move more. Pretty simple. And that's what I need to say when I am asked "How did you do it?" EAT LESS MOVE MORE. And if someone is rude enough to say, "How much have you lost?" I will say, THAT IS A SECRET!
The day is spreading out before me. The water awaits. And D & D is tonight. Oh yes. About that. I'm playing. Seriously. I'm a Drow Elf with an interesting history. I should write a novel about this.